I can barely keep my head up, I feel so awful. Mom has been really sick all week, and I'm pretty sure she passed it off to me yesterday. It just started with my throat, but I woke up and my chest was on fire. Now I'm coughing horribly (with worse soreness to my throat) and it feels like I'm off balance... it's awful.

We spend the entire day together since I work today, going clothes/shoe shopping and different places. She had a wonderful day, smiling because she felt so beautiful in all of the clothes we picked out for her... it was a spectacular day.

She cried when she read her Mothers Day card, and I knew she would. I did when I read it too. It was two simple lines, one on the outside and one on the inside. It led to how I think all of the good characteristics of me are inherited from her, and how our views are so alike at times.

Mom saw her specialist this week and her platelets have went up from 82k to 94k. It's wonderful news. She's having bleeding underneath the skin of her feet which aren't too noticeable, but it's not a good thing. ALSO, based on some things going on with her, two of her specialists have been consulting and think she's been poisoned. Either direct poison (not to say someone poisoned her, just that she has somehow came into contact with it somehow) or being around certain metals for too long in the recent history. I can't help but to wonder if the Eupora house had anything to do with it. That's all I could imagine.

Secondly, Ranee had an abnormal pap test which sent her to a specialist. He made a dye and I BELIEVE it was vinegar mix and the results also came back abnormal concerning her cervix. She had to have a biopsy and it's believed that she has cervical cancer. My mother had it in her 30s and the doctors have done all necessary tests to ensure that it would in fact only be a hereditary gene causing this and not something else. My appointment wont be too far off, but if it was passed to Ranee, I think I should pretty much expect something.

I've decided to finally write a few things about what's going on in my life. I know he reads this, and up until now, I decided to just keep everything to myself... but what's the point. I'm extremely happy and am not afraid to tell the world. I don't feel bad for being happy either, he got what he wanted and throughout the unhappyness and unstableness of moving back here, and I finally got my happiness.

Since I've been home, I've talked to a few new people. Mainly a guy I dated in JR High, my first bf ever. He's done pretty well for himself, sporting a brand new Dodge Charger that he's paying absolutely way too much for and with an obsession that's just a little crazy. We went on two dates before I swore him off. No matter what you remember about some people and how decent the night goes, the creeps really kill it for you. I don't want to hear how you think you knocked up some girl who just turned 18 while currently paying support on your other child. Or just how childish she is but how you "screw with her head". (With supporting stories.) Telling me how much you loved her didn't help either... but that's okay! Just another one down.

Soon after that, I met someone named Jonathan. I think know he's pulled me out of the dating pool. I knew that when I saw him that he was going to be absolutely special (and he has been). He makes me feel alive. He definitely keeps me on my toes. Although we don't share the same views on every topic, he absolutely relates to me better than anyone has before. Certain things that I've always been unable to talk about with people are really easy to talk about with him. Things such as my purpose, callings and different interests. So now that the world has been introduced to him, here's a few videos of him. I couldn't decide which one I liked best, so you all get two of them. Enjoy!!

(Btw, black and red suit, bass player.)

Tags: happiness, jon
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: Jon!